Sometimes in a crisis it can be disappointing to discover
that some people can have limited capacity to offer support. Instead of
rallying to support you and your partner they usually don’t know what to say.
They find it too confronting to face you and tend to retreat when you need them
most.
These people can be family members, close friends or
colleagues, whom you may have expected more from. It is important not to allow
their reaction add to your grief. If you dwell on this additional
disappointment, it can add to your suffering and take longer to heal.
It can be hard not to take it personally, but sometimes people
just don’t know how to deal with feelings and emotions, or may have limited
life experience to draw from. Others think it’s kinder not to bring up the
painful event, or may not know how to broach the subject. They may still feel empathy
for you, but don’t know how to show it or express it.
Accept this is who they are, as hard as it may be and focus
on the compassionate people who come forward to support you. It can be
surprising who offers you comfort when you and your partner are struggling.
Worth Remembering...
- The kindness of kindred souls who offer a shoulder, a hug or a cup of tea and a chat, can outweigh the disappointment of those who may be lacking in this quality.
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